Wednesday 25 July 2018

Why I admire Godless Mom

If you've spent any time around vocal atheism on twitter, Instagram, YouTube, or blogs, you've no doubt come across Godless Mom aka Courtney (I'll be referring to her as Godless Mom, GM, and Courtney) 

I was aware of her a long time before I connected with her. It was all likes and retweets until I saw she was trying to raise awareness of Mubarak Bala. Mubarak is a Nigerian man who was beaten, drugged, and unlawfully imprisoned in a psychiatric hospital by his father and uncles...because he's an atheist. You can read the full story, written by Courtney, here

I had a bit of profile on twitter and this seemed like something I could really help with, so I emailed Courtney offering my assistance. What GM did was simply amazing. She rallied people, organised people, contacted people. She did everything she could to free Mubarak from his hospital prison. It was my first real glimpse of the person behind the memes, the person behind the tweets. And I was impressed. 

Sometime later Courtney approached me asking me to write a guest spot for her blog. I couldn't believe it. GODLESS MOM wanted *me* to write something for her. Did I have a fanboy moment? I sure did! 

From here we started talking more and more, becoming super close friends and I got to know more and more about this wonderful person. 

We spoke a lot about high-level things: favourite bands, favourite movies, favourite books and the like. But also more in-depth things like our experiences with our kids, tough situations we'd been through and how we're both socialists. One thing we discussed was Courtney's friend Ashleigh Aston-Moore. Ashleigh was a young actress who, we discovered, played my favourite character in the film Now & Then. Ashleigh had a troubled life, which, sadly, came to an end in 2007. Courtney told me about her friendship with Ashleigh, and then what she went through went Ashleigh became ill and had trouble with drugs. Courtney recently wrote about the experience. You can read that story here. The lengths Courtney went to for her friend highlight was kind of person she is. So kind, so compassionate. It still brings a tear to my eye knowing this actually happened. 

If there is one thing I admire GM for, above all else, it's her kindness. She is a beautiful, kind, soul (I'm sure you know I don't mean soul in the religious sense). She just wants everyone to be happy. She's written about holding grudges (she's against) and being kind to people and wanting the best for everyone and is always supporting causes that mean people are treated equally and fairly. 

She seems to *always* be looking out for other people. Always putting her own life on hold to help others. I don't think I've known anyone to be so giving of themselves. She's raised money for a Youth Centre, she's spent hundreds of hours working on wrongful convictions, and she's recently written a serious about atheists on death row. She's also raising a son, who, from this distance at least, seems really cool (he's into Star Wars) and seems like a great kid, and a step-daughter that I know Courtney loves as though the 'step-' isn't there. I talk to GM pretty much every day and she's forever mentioning what she's down with the kids recently and what they're up to. She's an incredibly devoted and loving mother or 'mum' (I can't get on board this 'mom' stuff). 

If there's a close second to her kindness that I admire, it's her writing. I've never read a blog post of hers I didn't like. She's always thoughtful, and absolutely hilarious. Some of the phrases she uses just make me laugh out loud. 

The best thing she's ever written, and *by far* the best blog or blog series I've ever read is her series on the death penalty. I used to be in favour of the death penalty, but changed my mind many years ago. But I know that if I were still in favour, I wouldn't be after reading this series.  The link is to the final part of the series, Part 6, called 'The Ultimate Punishment'. It has links to all the previous parts. (I didn't link to the first part because that doesn't have links to the other parts!). It's an amazing piece of writing. It doesn't rely on emotion, but isn't just cold hard facts, either. If you come away from this series still in favour of the death penalty, then you have serious deficiencies in logic, reason, and compassion. 

Although GM is far more optimistic about this happening than I am, as previously mentioned, we are both strong socialists. I recognise that socialism fails (to a degree) because people are greedy and people are lazy. This is also why capitalism fails. However I strongly believe that if everyone was in it for everyone, socialism would be far better than capitalism. The countries that rate highest in population happiness and health and well-being, have strong socialist tendencies. Particularly socialised medicine, including universal healthcare. Courtney actually thinks this will one day be the world standard. She envisages a 'Star Trek' like world. That's how she describes it. I not only admire that this is her perfect view of the world, I admire her optimism in thinking it's going to happen. It may...but not in my lifetime. 

Getting to known Godless Mom has opened up a whole new world for me, not the least of which is being her colleague and co-host on our Podcast "Common Heathens" (Common, because we're both in the Commonwealth, and heathens, well...you know why). It's hard because of timezone differences. We really do have maybe a few hours each week in which we can get together to do it. If one of us happens to be busy, it can be two or more weeks before we can arrange another time. But I tell you...the wait is *always* worth it. We say it often, but it's just a highlight to be able to talk to my friend across the world. That people are interested in what we have to say is just an added bonus. It really is one of the things that makes my life better. 

I can't end this post about what I admire about Godless Mom without mentioning our friendship. To this day I still get a buzz when she sends me a message or mentions me on twitter or emails me or includes me in a post. I honestly still think 'Godless Mom talks to ME!'. It's a genuine thrill. 

There's no situation I can go to her with that she won't give me advice and offer a helping hand. From dealing with teenage girls, to setting up my photography business, to what kind of car to buy, to dealing with twitter trolls (her best advice ever: 'Don't let that cunt ruin twitter for you'). Sometimes it feels like she exists just to help me out. She also laughs at my jokes, likes what I have to say when I write blogs, and likes me enough to have me as a cohost on her podcast! She's happy when my football team wins and comforts me when they lose. And she LOVES my photos. She's always telling me that she loves my work and is asking me to come to her home town to take photos. It's a wonderful feeling to have someone you admire love your work so much. 

Despite all the above, I really don't have the words to describe properly why I admire Courtney so much. Without living in my head and knowing how having her in my life makes me feel, you'll just never understand. 

She is not only the best friend, by far, I've made thanks to being Mr Oz Atheist, she's simply the best thing to happen to me thanks to being Mr Oz Atheist. 

And that's why I admire Godless Mom. 

3 comments:

  1. Donovan, I don't know what to say. I'm so, so lucky to have you as a friend. This means so much to me, thank you!

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  2. Lovely post, and a great tribute to a wonderful woman.

    I've had a similar experience with another blogger. He and I have become close friends in a similar way to you two. We're on opposite sides of the world but Skype means we can chat all the time. I count myself incredibly lucky to have had this happen, and so I feel like I have at least a small insight into what you two have. It's a special thing to happen, and we need to appreciate and make the most of it.

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    Replies
    1. It’s so lovely when you can connect with someone like this. :)

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